Thursday, 14 April 2016

My Second-Biggest Battle of the Year- the Prom Dress

Through life we will face many challenges and have to overcome countless fears, big and small. Being in year 11 I am encountering my own on a day to day basis in the form of marks, grades and revision however, there is one beast looming in the background, an omnipresent and inescapable fear that I have been forced to confront- the prom dress.
Don't get me wrong, I am very excited about prom and love the idea of dresses and disney princess magic, unfortunately I am not at one with the humble ball gown. I have a painfully slow metabolism that never fails to remind me when my diet goes south; the constant battle of wanting to eat every doughnut in the pack but still wanting to wear my favourite jeans gets a little wearing after many years of the struggle. However I am learning to accept my body with its exaggerated hourglass shape that prevents me wearing any sort of leggings or tank top. Unfortunately this acceptance wears thin in the dress department. 

Today I went prom dress shopping with one of my best friends; she is unbelievably lovely, incredibly good company and absolutely drop-dead gorgeous. I was really looking forward to spending the day with her but had an unshakeable fear in the pit of my stomach when it came to the dress side of the trip. First we went into 'Coast' a beautiful dress shop where my cousin got a stunning bridesmaid dress for her sisters wedding, I felt calmer knowing she had achieved glory within those four walls. The first dress I tried on actually wasn't that bad, it was a style that suited my shape- fitted at the top and flaring out at the hips- leaving plenty of room for a food baby (an inescapable reality with the school organising a three course meal at the start of our prom- really, I'm not joking!) Unfortunately the dress front went downhill from there, when you peak early you know you're doomed! All the while my friend looked stunning in every outfit she wore- things were not looking good. 

But this is where the situation really took me by surprise. I didn't have a horrible time, in fact I had an unexpectedly amazing day, the soul reason- we laughed. Truly, any situation can be made better, even enjoyable, if you see the humour in it; so when I put on what I thought was a beautiful dress and it turned out to be the most unflattering playsuit in the world, I didn't feel like I wanted the ground to swallow me up, in fact I actually found it funny!

And this changed everything. Instead of dreading trying on our dresses or being meticulously picky when choosing them, I had fun with anything I wanted, putting on something just for fun even though there was a very large possibility it looked absolutely shocking! This strangely liberating experience has left me so shocked I turned on my computer and wrote about it, I want to remember how this felt and know that something that I'm scared about or would be easier not to do may just turn out to be the best day of the Easter break. Also, when you choose not to worry about what you look like, and wear things you want not what you feel like you should, you take back control over your wardrobe, something I'm not used to but will definitely be doing more off.

So, I haven't got a prom dress, that's something I've still got to tackle, but it doesn't fill me with nearly as much dread as before, in fact, I'm actually looking forward to it!

Ruthie Xx